First let me start off this post by saying that the only day I missed CrossFit this week was Christmas Day and they were CLOSED so it doesn’t COUNT! Now that’s saying something. My Lassig Diaper Bag that looks like a purse because it’s totally awesome) has seen much more glamorous days and a lot less sweating than it did this week. You see that post above. If every menu broke down foods into how many burpees were required to burn those calories off we would all eat a lot more celery. For those of you that haven’t experienced burpees, I highly recommend them for motivating you to continue to workout and to get into shape. NOT!
“Those were some enjoyable burpees.” Said no one ever. <— That sentence right there is an UNDERSTATEMENT if I’ve ever heard one. Honestly, I’m not sure which sucks more; burpees or running. Both make me miserable, both hurt my knees and oh my poor shins are crying out in pain right now. Buck Furpees! Seriously BUCK FURPEES!
Laugh all you want to but the only people that say I :heart: Burpees are the people that :heart: to HATE BURPEES! They suck. Today’s WOD was a cardio WOD. My husband being the sweet and wonderful man that he is assured me that the Friday WOD would be a strength WOD. After all, I had to be there at 7am and he wanted me to go hiking afterwards. The least he could do is reassure me that there would be NO BURPEES or RUNNING or JUMP ROPING. No such FREAKING luck. Nope. Not even.
Remember Kevin, the nice one, the guy that carried me through the first WOD and saw to it that I didn’t quit and say screw this? Remember the one that I told you about where CrossFit is like a cult but without a creepy leader? I changed my freaking mind. COMPLETELY CHANGED MY MIND I TELL YOU! I gave him some kick ass, custom-made, with the box’s logo by Atlas Power Wraps tonight. I hope he feels guilty, really guilty. That’s cue for BE NICE THIS UPCOMING WEEK DAMNIT. I’ve been great this week! I’ve went to CrossFit and completed the WODs regardless of how ridiculously hard they’ve been.
After yesterday’s workout, I feel the need to tell everyone that completed that WOD… HOLY HELLO you all kicked that WODs ass! Nice work! So, our warm up starts out with 10 minutes of jump roping. Jump roping SUCKS and is probably another reason why my shins absolutely hate me. Anything on the BOARD always looks easier than it is in reality.
For anyone reading that didn’t participate in the WOD on Thursday, here’s what we had to do yesterday:
2x
50 Pull-Ups
75 ABMAT Sit Ups
50 Overhead Squats
75 Double Unders or 225 Single Jumps
And here is Today’s WOD:
3X
500M Row
21 Burpees
400M Run
I HATED this workout. But what I hated more was how excited and EASY everyone kept saying this WOD was and how it’s SOOOOO much better than the day before. SPEAK FOR YOURSELVES muscle heads. Don’t get me wrong, the dedication, determination, endurance, commitment, drive and SWEAT that I see in the CrossFitters at my box is and always will be entirely inspirational. However, that inspiration can be served very well from my couch while watching the CrossFit Games and saying how bad ass everyone is because I don’t need to be bad ass. Living is good. Survival is required. CrossFit doesn’t go with living and survival. It does however go with pain, suffering, torture, and heinousness. All of the members of my box kick ass. Let’s do a cheer. WOOHOO for you. CROSSFIT still SUCKS!
While finishing my WOD my husband is encouraging me not to quit. He knows that if given the opportunity my ass would hightail it out of there like an Indy 500 race. Dustin, made the comment on Thursday that if I worked out as much as I ran my mouth, I’d kick everyone’s ass. Tisk, tisk, tisk, shaking my head, we all know how RIGHT you are Dustin and since murder didn’t pop into mind, you’ve been accepted into the fold. Welcome aboard. However, now know that you get a nickname too and just remember how often you hear my husband say, “She’s so mean.” :devil:
Dustin thinks he’s Superman. There is even a slight albeit uncanny resemblance. They’re both tall, dark hair, square jaw, thick eyebrows and both think they’re super. They even have the same hair. BAHAHA Don’t worry I have more comparisons of the CrossFitters at the box and in due time I shall post them as well. My husband finds these quite comical and thought I should share with all of my loyal and amazing readers. LOL
Bobby and Richard below will be talked about tomorrow. I’m totally not ATTENDING CrossFit on Saturday. No THANK YOU!
During this WOD we only had so many rowers. Some don’t work, so you have to use the clock. It takes me 2:20 to row 500m. Kevin had already “FORGOT” to tell me and left me rowing for an extra minute. My shins are killing me and I want to go home. So, I’m on the last round of the three and I’m doing my burpees. My husband proceeds to “count” them for/with me to encourage and motivate. My ass, he wasn’t doing any more burpees. I seriously can’t blame him. He’s counting 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 13…WTF, I don’t think so buddy. Without even thinking I immediately stomp, plant my feet, whip my head around, :reallypissed: glare at him with the most murderous look imaginable and SHOUT, “I’M AT 15 YOU LIAR!” Superman, Daredevil and Green Lantern immediately burst into laughter. I’m not sure how this was funny. It was SO not funny at the time. In fact, I was quite furious. My husband started laughing. My husband is quiet, he doesn’t talk in front of people that he doesn’t know, and even people that he does know. It takes him a LONG time to warm up to people. So, for him to crack a smile anywhere besides home is rare and unheard of so you can imagine how hysterical it was but it was NOT even REMOTELY funny to me in the least little bit. You can make me do a lot of things but, I will NOT do extra BURPEES. EVER! On that note I’m taking my wonderful son to gymnastics practice tomorrow which means I can forego the illusive and horrendous thing known as Team WODs. Enjoy tomorrow. See you all next week. WOOHOO I get a break from CrossFit. ~Doing a happy dance, until I realize my shins hurt like HOLY HELLO and I’m laying my fat ass in the bed and going to sleep.~
By the way, the other CrossFit Uncensored Superheroes can be found here.
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